[pressgang] Quote of the Day, January 14, 2015

[Kevin Nauta]

Tommy: Now,
I've just about had...Oh. Sorry. 
Old Lady: I
wonder if you could help me. It's my plastic hip. 
Tommy: What? 
Old Lady: Oh my
goodness! Aren't you that world famous...Oh, what do they call those people? 
Tommy: Yes, I
am. How can I help you? 
Old Lady: You
see I'm supposed to meet some friends down in the town, but what with my
artificial bits...And then I saw your nice car. 
Tommy: Oh I see!
And where exactly was it that you'd be wanting a lift to? 
Old Lady: Oh,
somewhere around about where they're opening that new shop, that would do. 
Tommy:
Grandmother? Great-aunt? 
Old Lady: Oh. 
Tommy: Whatever
your relationship to Colin, Mrs Mathews, just tell him to forget it! 
Old Lady:
"You rumbled me". 
Tommy:
"That's right, sweetheart". 
He closes
the door. Colin comes up to her. 
Colin: What did you let on for?
Old Lady: He guessed. He called me "Mrs
Mathews"!
Colin: (pays her) Aunt, you're on my mother's
side. Your name's not Mathews!
Old Lady: Oh dear. I keep forgetting that.
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