[pressgang] Quote of the Day, December 28, 2017

[Kevin Nauta]

Spike: Where are you?

Lynda:  Itold you, I'm at home! Are you accusing me of lying? So am I late or what?

Spike: With your usual dumb excuse, yeah.

Lynda:  Isaid I'd come! Spike, I'm hurt – you think I spend the whole time lying to you?

Spike: When it suits you.

Lynda: Right, and only when.


 
Crawford comes down the stair and puts a key inthe lock.   


 
Spike: So if you're at home, how come I had to phone you on your mobile? Thephone in your flat is ringing out.

Lynda: Well excuse me if I don't leap up and freeze to death in the hall! Ihappen to be in the bath!

Crawford: Stay here, I'll be back in a moment.

Lynda: Fine, right.

Spike: Who was that?

Lynda: Ah, there's a water shortage.

Spike: So you got someone in the bath with you?

Lynda: I'm joking. It's just, you know, the plumber.


 
She walks over to the lock on the wall.

 

Spike: You got the plumber there while you're in the bath?

Lynda: It's okay; he's blind.

Spike: Blind?

Lynda: Yeah, why not - you can plumb blind!


 
She presses a key. ”Enter” flashes on the smallwindow. 


 
Spike:  Iwanna speak to him.

Lynda: Ah... He's gone out to his van.

Spike: He drives?

Lynda: What's your lucky number? 

Spike: Excuse me, but I would like to know more about this blind drivingplumber you bathe with! Could you explain any of that?

Lynda: Well I'm lying obviously. You know me.

Spike:  Don't I just!

Lynda: He can see me fine.

Spike: Tell me, boss, what am I still dating you for?

Lynda: Ask my plumber.

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