[pressgang] Quote of the Day, June 8, 2025

[prydonia]

Colin:You look down, Frazz.

Frazz:Yeah, well you know how it is. Just tension, I guess.

Colin:Hey, tension - I can relate to that! Stress City, right?

Frazz:Yeah, I just don't seem to find a readily available and harmless method of relaxation at a price I can afford.

A small group of people has now gathered around them to listen.

Colin:You know, Frazz, a lot of people have said that to me. And that's why CM Enterprises have come up with the Rubber Relaxer!

Frazz:What is a Rubber Relaxer?

Colin:I'm glad you asked me that. (picks up a sucker) It's one of these, Frazz. A Rubberized Tactile Tension Extractor. (puts one on the forehead) Tests have proven by wearing one of these, you can actually reduce frowning.

Frazz:That is amazing…!

Colin:Yes! And at a price you can afford, only one pound for a CM Enterprises Rubber Relaxer!

The crowd begins to scatter.

Colin:Nine out of ten people who've tried them couldn't be bothered to say whether they'd worked or not! Come on, form all a queue, no fighting at the back. Come on, suckers - I mean people!

Frazz:Nice try.

Colin jumps down from the table.

Colin: (bitterly) They'll buy them. I'll make them buy!
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